Think about the areas where your child is struggling. Perhaps there are only one or two areas, or maybe you could fill a notebook with them all.
What we want to do is identify the issues that are regularly causing conflict and tension in your relationship. When something consistently harms the relationship, your child’s ability to emotionally regulate, or to take responsibility, we call these “Red Light” Issues.
A question we ask parents all the time is, “What most often gets in the way of Relationship, Emotional Regulation, and/or Responsibility?” If emptying the dishwasher consistently gets in the way of these three things, it is a red light issue.
Download and complete the Issues & Concerns Worksheet to help identify your red light issues and clarify your thoughts, emotions and desires related to the issues you have identified.
Once you have identified the red light issues for your child you are ready for the next step.