ROXANNE THAYNE: Stay in Touch: 11 Ways Physical Contact Heals Us

Ours is an age of contradictions. Where solitude used to feel like a rare luxury . . . it has recently begun to feel lonely.

With months of forced separation, hugs, handshakes and even bright smiles feel like a thing of the past. I so long for the days when I could let my personality and natural tendencies to touch communicate my acceptance or love for someone.

Today when I think back on meaningful touches from others, I realize that though none of these folks were professionally trained in the healing arts, I found that our physical connection had a way of seeping into my body in deep and satisfying ways.

They were the givers and I was the grateful receiver. This collection of moments is simple, yet the contact was punctuated by the emotional impression they left behind.

COMPANIONSHIP: There is a comfort and warmth found with a puppy’s head resting on my thigh, even as I’m forced to type with my laptop balanced on the other thigh. I sit contentedly in this awkward workspace—long past the time I was productive—because we’ve created a mutual sense of protection and belonging.

TRUST: As a mother, the reach of my fussing baby, who would immediately calm and relax into my arms, was considered a bonus for those bleary-eyed late nights. With their head on my shoulder and a slight bounce in my walk, my touch turned out to be the prescribed remedy for nightmares, separation anxiety, and countless other ills.

ENCOURAGEMENT: While sitting in church, whether I am touched by a thought or overwhelmed with my life, I will regularly feel a tap on my shoulder and see a clean, white tissue being passed up to me to catch my brimming tears. This generous friend is quick to see a need and fill it. From the pew behind, I have been quietly handed cough drops, gum, and even Wifi passwords.

HEALING: As a teenager, when I’d return from another interminable swing shift of waiting tables at the coffee shop, I’d count up my tips as my father would watch the news and rub my aching feet. That act of service both loosened the tired muscles and conveyed his appreciation for my hard work and progress into adulthood.

ATTRACTION: I was still unsure of where our regular dates were taking us, but during a slow song at the university’s homecoming dance, I held my breath as my cheek came in contact with his cheek. Neither of us pulled away. That moment was electric and has never been forgotten. It sparked a romance of 30 years and counting.

RELAXATION: After the eight-hour road trip to Grandma’s house, we kids would tumble out of the car door fighting and bursting with pent-up energy. The most anticipated moment of our visit was bedtime, when we’d stretch out on the trundle bed and—in the dim glow of Grandpa’s desk lamp—Grandma would speak in whispers and gently rub the kinks out of our bare backs. We loved her scratchy- smooth hands, dry as sandpaper from years of dedicated work in her garden and kitchen.

ACCEPTANCE: Handshakes may seem rather obligatory, but historically and in my own experience, this familiar gesture is a universal signal of acknowledgement and approval. The act of bridging the physical span between us has repeatedly warmed me up in meeting someone that I initially felt intimidated or put off by. A firm clasp of my hand helps my subconscious respond with “Well now . . . they aren’t so bad after all.”

CELEBRATION: To celebrate good news alone isn’t satisfying. The first time I had an article published in a magazine I had to share it or I felt I would burst. With a flushed face, I interrupted an important call my husband was on. And bless him, he didn’t disappoint. He gave me a loud whoop and a double high five. A thumbs up or word of congratulation just wouldn’t have packed the same punch.

UNDERSTANDING: You know those moments when something is said, and the person seated next to you presses their knee or elbow into yours? It’s a physical connection that can be translated into “I know what you’re thinking.” Or perhaps “Can you believe it?” A touch is worth a thousand words when you can’t say anything out loud.

WELCOME: Remember the last time you went for a handshake, but were instead pulled into an enthusiastic embrace? It can be startling at first, but another’s delight can be so fun. Whether it’s on a first meeting or it’s been a long day since you’ve come face-to-face, a hug physically says “You’re home.”

COMFORT: Sitting beside my mother’s hospital bed two days before she passed, she expressed that she didn’t want to leave us. I reassured her that we would be fine. She began to cry, and then I simply lost it. I buried my head into her side and cried big hot tears. With the little strength she had left, she lifted her hand and gently brushed my hair back from my face. It was the most familiar and comforting gesture this fifty-year-old daughter could have asked for in a farewell touch from her mother.

 

Known as a bright-idea-factory, Roxanne sparkles when she connects with others over mothering, ministering, and marketing. Learn more about how she helps readers design beautiful, faith-filled lives on Instagram @roxannethayne.

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Mike Christian

Back-End Developer & DevOps​

Mike is one of those brilliant, self-taught, back end developers that you always hear about. As a youth he could trust that “My mother would love me no matter what . . .” When he isn’t cranking out new code, Mike keeps up on the newest technologies and every Tuesday and Thursday nights he trains SpeedSoft with his team.

Rafael Pampoch

Web Developer

Rafael has his degree in Marketing and Advertising and years of experience with our dev team. As a teen he could trust that “The most important thing in life is love, and the most valuable things are our family and friends.” When he isn’t working on making the website and mobile versions of Trustyy seamless and functional, he unwinds by exploring nature. His favorite activities are climbing mountains, camping, going to the beach, swimming, playing the harmonica and always learning new things.

Afton Wilde

Accounting

Afton’s experience is in marketing and bookkeeping.  As a teen she could trust that with her parents “Feeding the horses and milking the cow each day before school–not after–was a must.”  When she isn’t busy with keeping Trustyy’s lights on, you’ll usually find her baking up a new treat or working on a sewing project.

Nicoli Cristini

Marketing Assistant

Nicoli has a degree in Multimedia Production.  She has worked with our team of developers for three years.  She learned to trust her own parents when they taught her “Things won’t come easy and that working hard will bring me great blessings!”  When she isn’t putting together beautiful marketing pieces for the Trustyy App she likes to take pictures, play the guitar, piano, and drums, and meet up with her family to laugh over the silly things they did as kids.

Adriano Rodrigues

Mobile Developer

Adriano is certified in Analysis and Systems Development.  In his family he could trust the fact that “One difficult experience teaches me that failure is not the end, but rather an opportunity for growth and learning.”  When he is away from his work in making sure the Trustyy App buttons and bells and whistles are working properly, he likes to go to the gym, to the beach to surf, on walks with his dog, or go out with his girlfriend.

Lucas Baumgart

Product Designer

Lucas’s work experience is in User Experience, Interface Design and Product Management. As a teen he could trust that “In my home honesty was highly valued and lying was not tolerated.”  When he isn’t at work making sure the Trustyy App is easy on the eyes, Lucas likes hiking, gaming, going out for dinner, and spending time with family.

Cadu Olivera

Front End Developer

Cadu has his education in Analysis and System Development.  While growing up he could always trust that “My parents would be there to support from playing soccer at the park to learning to ride a bike.”   When he isn’t making sure things are easily navigated for our Trustyy App users, he likes to play beach soccer and enjoy music of any type, but specifically rock, country, R&B, and pop.

Mike Curi

Back End Developer

Mike is one of those brilliant, self-taught, back-end developers that you always hear about. As a youth he could trust that “My mother would love me no matter what.” When he isn’t cranking out new code, Mike keeps up on the newest technologies and every Tuesday and Thursday nights he trains SpeedSoft with his team. 

Roxanne Thayne

Co-Founder/Chief Marketing Officer

Roxanne received her bachelor’s degree in history and secondary education.  She has worked in publishing and marketing for the past 14 years.  In her family Roxanne says she could trust that “Her grammar and posture would be consistently corrected, to help her to become a lady.”  When she isn’t busy writing and beautifying things for the Trustyy App, you can find her reading biographies, practicing yoga, or gathering the family to talk business, celebrate wins or just plain hang out.

Sidney Rodrigues

Co-Founder/Chief Technology Officer

Sidney has a bachelor’s degree in Web Development and has worked in technology for 16 years, building apps for the last 10 years. Growing up he could trust that “It was always expected that I would fix anything related to technology.”  When he isn’t managing the development of the Trustyy App, you will find him spending time with his wife and kids. He loves to make Brazillian BBQ with his family.

Jim Lee

Co-Founder/Chief Product Officer

Jim has a degree in Design and over 25 years of experience creating SaaS products and managing talented product and development teams.  In his years at home as the oldest of five he could trust that “Each child got a weekly ‘night-up’ where we got to stay up late with a parent and do anything we wanted with them.”  When he isn’t looking 10 miles down the road for what will come next on the Trustyy App, you will find Jim canyoneering, doing photography, watercolor painting, or keeping up on the latest gadgets and technologies.

Eric Turner

Co-Founder/Chief Operations Officer

Eric earned his degree in Communications, Public Relations and Advertising, then added on an MBA.  He says he could trust that “His parents were honest people who kept their commitments–especially to their kids.”  When Eric isn’t keeping everyone at Trustyy on task, he is an outdoor enthusiast, year around, rain or shine, cold or hot, with biking in the summer and skiing in the winter.

Tim Thayne

Founder | Chief Executive Officer

Tim earned masters and doctoral degrees in Marriage and Family Therapy, and has 30 years of experience working with families.  While growing up Tim says he could trust that “My mother would love me no matter what, and that my dad would require that I respect my mother.”  When he isn’t busy guiding the vision for the Trustyy App, you can find Tim working around the house and yard, taking care of his sheep, dogs and horses, or enjoying a game of Corn Hole with the family.