TIM THAYNE: The Fight. How Safety is Found in Community

The town of Duchesne (pronounced due-shayne) was what our school referred to as the armpit of the earth. This small town was the one nearest to my rural town of Altamont, so naturally our school sports teams were bitter rivals.

When your class of 32 plays sports together through junior and high school, you find yourself playing against the same kids, season after season. The guy I was matched up with was called “Purple.” I’m sure he had a name, but that’s what everyone referred to him as. We hit and tackled each other for three years of high school football and we guarded each other in some of the most intense games of my moderately successful basketball career. The matchup on the court during my senior year, however, turned out to be the most memorable.

Though we were the visiting team, our hometown crowd filled the stands. Everyone in our community made this rivalry game a priority. The lead went back and forth, punctuated with a lot of trash talk, between the two teams. But in the end the Altamont Longhorns pulled ahead to victory. We were elated. We tumbled into the locker room for some hard won back slapping and bragging.

When we had showered and dressed, we headed back across the court to leave. A few fans were still hanging around visiting, as well as the entire Duchesne team. Which was odd. We continued to walk past them with the typical “good game” salutation.

When I got to Purple he said “You guys think you’re pretty tough don’t you?” With my duffle in one hand and my uniform on a hanger in the other, I pointed to the scoreboard and said “That’s what it says.”

With that he took a swing, I ducked and dropped my bag, then grabbed him and threw him to the ground at midcourt. But, before I could do anything Purple and I were both flat on the floor on our stomachs with both teams piling on top of us. I couldn’t move, much less do any damage. As quickly as it had started, I suddenly felt myself get yanked out of the pile and held from behind. With the adrenaline pumping I started to throw elbows and punch over the top of my head to get at whoever had me.

“Calm down Tim. Just calm down.” said a firm voice. It was my teammate’s dad. A gentle, 6’4”, 280 pound farmer. As he restrained me, I looked around to see that fights had broken out all over the gym and that his own son was being held back by someone else’s dad. Simultaneously the adults had stepped in to stop the hormone riddled youth before they could do something dangerous or that they would soon regret. These men wisely ushered us out and onto the bus where we resumed our revelries all the way home.

That night I was oblivious. But as I look back over the decades, it’s become apparent that my home team extended far beyond the teammates on the court. It included the men and women from my community who had a vested interest in us as “their” youth. They didn’t wait to be asked. They didn’t excuse themselves from responsibility. The community’s value of non-violence and living a higher law shone through.

Today, the incidents of home team members stepping up and reaching out are shared with me weekly as I work with the families of teens and young adults. I’ll admit that I’m a softy now and tear up easily; and the topic that gets me every time is the unexpected loyalty, sacrifice and love shown for young people outside of their immediate family.

Tim Thayne is a marriage and family therapist and the blessed father of five teens and young adults. Though the kids never took up his affinity for basketball, (or a good post-game rumble) as a family they do enjoy mountain biking, traveling to personally significant locations around the world and telling stories about the good old days.

tim headshot

Dr. Tim Thayne Presents:

How Parents Can Put A Stop To Their Teen's Self Destructive Behaviors WITHOUT Conflict Or Walking On Eggshells

Mike Christian

Back-End Developer & DevOps​

Mike is one of those brilliant, self-taught, back end developers that you always hear about. As a youth he could trust that “My mother would love me no matter what . . .” When he isn’t cranking out new code, Mike keeps up on the newest technologies and every Tuesday and Thursday nights he trains SpeedSoft with his team.

Rafael Pampoch

Web Developer

Rafael has his degree in Marketing and Advertising and years of experience with our dev team. As a teen he could trust that “The most important thing in life is love, and the most valuable things are our family and friends.” When he isn’t working on making the website and mobile versions of Trustyy seamless and functional, he unwinds by exploring nature. His favorite activities are climbing mountains, camping, going to the beach, swimming, playing the harmonica and always learning new things.

Afton Wilde

Accounting

Afton’s experience is in marketing and bookkeeping.  As a teen she could trust that with her parents “Feeding the horses and milking the cow each day before school–not after–was a must.”  When she isn’t busy with keeping Trustyy’s lights on, you’ll usually find her baking up a new treat or working on a sewing project.

Nicoli Cristini

Marketing Assistant

Nicoli has a degree in Multimedia Production.  She has worked with our team of developers for three years.  She learned to trust her own parents when they taught her “Things won’t come easy and that working hard will bring me great blessings!”  When she isn’t putting together beautiful marketing pieces for the Trustyy App she likes to take pictures, play the guitar, piano, and drums, and meet up with her family to laugh over the silly things they did as kids.

Adriano Rodrigues

Mobile Developer

Adriano is certified in Analysis and Systems Development.  In his family he could trust the fact that “One difficult experience teaches me that failure is not the end, but rather an opportunity for growth and learning.”  When he is away from his work in making sure the Trustyy App buttons and bells and whistles are working properly, he likes to go to the gym, to the beach to surf, on walks with his dog, or go out with his girlfriend.

Lucas Baumgart

Product Designer

Lucas’s work experience is in User Experience, Interface Design and Product Management. As a teen he could trust that “In my home honesty was highly valued and lying was not tolerated.”  When he isn’t at work making sure the Trustyy App is easy on the eyes, Lucas likes hiking, gaming, going out for dinner, and spending time with family.

Cadu Olivera

Front End Developer

Cadu has his education in Analysis and System Development.  While growing up he could always trust that “My parents would be there to support from playing soccer at the park to learning to ride a bike.”   When he isn’t making sure things are easily navigated for our Trustyy App users, he likes to play beach soccer and enjoy music of any type, but specifically rock, country, R&B, and pop.

Mike Curi

Back End Developer

Mike is one of those brilliant, self-taught, back-end developers that you always hear about. As a youth he could trust that “My mother would love me no matter what.” When he isn’t cranking out new code, Mike keeps up on the newest technologies and every Tuesday and Thursday nights he trains SpeedSoft with his team. 

Roxanne Thayne

Co-Founder/Chief Marketing Officer

Roxanne received her bachelor’s degree in history and secondary education.  She has worked in publishing and marketing for the past 14 years.  In her family Roxanne says she could trust that “Her grammar and posture would be consistently corrected, to help her to become a lady.”  When she isn’t busy writing and beautifying things for the Trustyy App, you can find her reading biographies, practicing yoga, or gathering the family to talk business, celebrate wins or just plain hang out.

Sidney Rodrigues

Co-Founder/Chief Technology Officer

Sidney has a bachelor’s degree in Web Development and has worked in technology for 16 years, building apps for the last 10 years. Growing up he could trust that “It was always expected that I would fix anything related to technology.”  When he isn’t managing the development of the Trustyy App, you will find him spending time with his wife and kids. He loves to make Brazillian BBQ with his family.

Jim Lee

Co-Founder/Chief Product Officer

Jim has a degree in Design and over 25 years of experience creating SaaS products and managing talented product and development teams.  In his years at home as the oldest of five he could trust that “Each child got a weekly ‘night-up’ where we got to stay up late with a parent and do anything we wanted with them.”  When he isn’t looking 10 miles down the road for what will come next on the Trustyy App, you will find Jim canyoneering, doing photography, watercolor painting, or keeping up on the latest gadgets and technologies.

Eric Turner

Co-Founder/Chief Operations Officer

Eric earned his degree in Communications, Public Relations and Advertising, then added on an MBA.  He says he could trust that “His parents were honest people who kept their commitments–especially to their kids.”  When Eric isn’t keeping everyone at Trustyy on task, he is an outdoor enthusiast, year around, rain or shine, cold or hot, with biking in the summer and skiing in the winter.

Tim Thayne

Founder | Chief Executive Officer

Tim earned masters and doctoral degrees in Marriage and Family Therapy, and has 30 years of experience working with families.  While growing up Tim says he could trust that “My mother would love me no matter what, and that my dad would require that I respect my mother.”  When he isn’t busy guiding the vision for the Trustyy App, you can find Tim working around the house and yard, taking care of his sheep, dogs and horses, or enjoying a game of Corn Hole with the family.