Home Team: Make the Most of Your Team

Now that you have started to put together your Home Team, let’s talk about what you can do to tap into it’s full potential. Let’s sort these ideas into three general categories: (1) Staying connected, (2) Making requests, (3) Holding get-togethers. Your Trustyy transition coach will have addition insights and suggestions for each of these categories.

Stay connected

In our busy world, most of us fall victim to the “Out of sight, out of mind” tendency. In addition, we tend not to have the time it takes to stay connected with everyone in our lives. The Family Bridge is the perfect solution to help address these two significant realities! Through the Family Bridge you can easily stay connected with your Home Team with the click of a few buttons. Information can be shared with everyone or with a select few. You decide!

Here are some of the simple ways you can use your personalized Family Bridge portal to stay connected:

• You can list your individual goals, thus inviting others to support you.
• You can post important news to your entire Home Team by using the Team Blog.
• You can send messages to one or more Home Team members just like email.
• You can invite your Home Team to share ideas and suggestions for how to handle certain challenges you might be facing.
• You can upload pictures of your teen and family to share with others.
• You can put events on the calendar, including your teen’s activities (e.g. football games) to encourage others to attend or just wish your teen good luck, etc.

Making requests

Some of the things Home Team members do will happen on their own initiative. However, some of the most effective help will come when you make specific requests. Team members often find it easier to connect if they are given something specific to do. Here are some examples of what you might ask Home Team members to do:

• Send a message of encouragement when your teen is struggling.
• Share any information about job opportunities or even help your teen get set up with a job.
• Write or talk with your teen about a specific topic that may be received best from someone other than you (e.g., an adult who is a recovering addict himself and can talk straight with your teen).
• Take your teen to lunch, giving them a chance to talk – perhaps about a specific issue, or just for a “lift.”
• Include your teen in a service opportunity.
• Go with your teen to an AA meeting.
• Tutor your teen in a school subject.

In addition to making requests, take time to express appreciation to these individuals. As a thank you, you might invite them over for a BBQ dinner or dessert. You could also look for opportunities to give back by reaching out and helping them in some way.

Get-together with your Home Team

Click here to see some examples of how you might invite someone to a Home Team get-together.Holding a Home Team get-together in your home is one of the best things you can do to help kick-start your Home Team. This is a great opportunity to pull everyone together and fuel the momentum for change. It’s also a fantastic way to help melt away any shame your teen might have about being “sent away.” Time and time again we have seen how powerful this type of gathering can be!

Trustyy transition coaches have been privileged to be a part of more than one thousand Home Team gatherings over the past decade and a half. These experiences have taught us how to best facilitate these gatherings in a way that creates a comfortable atmosphere, honors the teen’s journey and progress, and rallies the Home Team around the teen’s goals. In just one evening, Home Team members get a chance to see the changes your teen has made, his accomplishments, and his current maturity. The experience helps your teen begin to let go of the feeling that everyone sees them as “the problem.” As a result, your teen tends to also be more apt to let go of old behaviors and be more receptive of help and support from others.

In addition, parents receive guidance from their transition coach about their role in the evening. With this guidance they are able to participate in a way that tells their teen, “We’re in this together. I’m going to be doing my part to make this work.” As you can imagine, this is very motivating to the teen, who may have previously felt that he was the only one having to make changes.

It’s amazing to see how the teen can light up as they hear their friends and family compliment them, recognize their progress, and often remark on how their growth is visible in their appearance and mannerisms. Though teens are often nervous about the Home Team get-together, they almost always end the evening appreciating the experience!

We would be happy to help you plan for such an evening with your Home Team. Let us know if you’d like our help. To learn more, go to www.trustyy.com.

Click here for a list of ideas for what different Home Team members can do to help.

Additional get-togethers with your Home Team

After you have had the first Home Team get-together, you will likely be more comfortable having another one. We suggest that families meet with the Home Team at least two to three times during the first few months and then as it seems appropriate from thereon. It is important to note that these get-togethers can occur whether things are going well or not.

We have found that there tends to be five general reasons for getting together with your Home Team. Each of those reasons is described briefly below. Keep in mind that depending on the purpose and the circumstances of your situation, you may invite all of the Home Team or just a select few to participate in additional get-togethers. Your Trustyy transition coach can provide additional information as needed.

1. Celebration/Accountability – This is an opportunity to fuel the momentum by highlighting what is going well individually and as a family. Home Team members have an opportunity to share their unique perspective on how they see things progressing (e.g., in school, church, therapy). It is also a time for each family member to identify what they could be doing better, and if necessary, to identify ways the Home Team can help.
2. Connection – This type of meeting is focused on “getting-together”, social interaction, and fun. It may be that there is no formal discussion of your family’s progress or concerns. Rather, it simply provides an opportunity to strengthen your relationships with Home Team members.
3. Education – There are times when it may be helpful to invite one of the professionals on your Home Team to provide education on a topic that would benefit multiple members of the Home Team. Topics may include substance abuse and addiction, information on relevant diagnoses, how to avoid enabling, or any other topic that seems beneficial.
4. Problem-Solving – There may be problems that arise, and a Home Team meeting can be a great resource for discussing and brainstorming possible solutions. By involving the Home Team, you will accomplish three important objectives: 1) Home Team members will be updated on current issues, 2) Energy and ideas from the Home Team will help provide renewed hope, and 3) A plan of action will be created that involves the support of multiple Home Team members.
5. Emergency – There may be situations in which you feel an emergency Home Team meeting may be necessary. Possible topics may include multiple positive drug tests, running away, and impending major life decisions such as dropping out of school. These meetings should be handled appropriately. Involving your transition coach (or other professional) is highly recommended, as they often play a significant role in this type of meeting.